If I am not having a the worse case of the Mondays (Office Space--loves it!) I can't think about anything. Well that's not true. I can't think about anything that is work related. So I'm supposed to go see a house after work today and that's all I'm thinking about. I have the gift and the curse of my parents doing the primary search and then if they think it's worth it, I'll swoop in and give the go ahead. So the house this afternoon has gotten the pre-approval--pending some minor changes.
My mom gave me the heads up that the bathroom is pink. We're totally convinced that when the houses were built, there was a sale on pink tile as almost every house has the pink tile in my suburban Brooklyn neighborhood--unless of course someone was smart and renovated! I have this feeling in my gut though, that I will like the place...I am literally moved by the prospect of it. So I have spent the morning looking up design ideas for the living room and bathroom. Did you know that you can paint over ceramic tile? Painting is seeming like such a wonderful idea for this financially strapped sister who despite my enduring love of things pink--a bathroom is not one of them. And there is hope to change the sink and toilet, put some bathroom carpet down, throw in some bathroom accessories and a shower curtain to hide the pink tub and voila.
You see and this is why I can't concentrate? I haven't even seen the place, but I have already mentally painted the 2 bedrooms, the living room and bought backyard furniture. I'm excited about the PROSPECT of moving and it MOVES me. I already see the book club being over, backyard grilling, and random celebrations that gives me an excuse to play hostess in the suburbs of Brooklyn. In my mind, I have cut a piece of the ivy plant from the childhood backyard and planted in "my yard" for the symbolism of taking my childhood with me, taking my "home" to my new home, and my beloved ivy--resilient and substantive, lovely and strong, delicate and independent.
You see I'm an optimist and person with an active imagination... but really I'm entertaining myself through the slow moments, preparing for the next big step.
Love & Light
Monday, June 8, 2009
Thursday, June 4, 2009
Reading Anyone
About a year ago, my friends and I were talking (via long email threads) about how we don't see each other enough and we don't get together for something other than a birthday or wedding or baby shower, and that nearly is not enough. And the idea was put out there to have a bookclub. So once a month or so, give or take because scheduling 8 women to get together is tricky, we go to someone's house and talk about a book. No really we do. Well apart of the time at least.
No let's talk about this bookclub. Yes, we choose some juicy literally novel--sorry no hood novels allowed--and read it. Holding off on all conversations about the book other than the random "Did you finish the book yet?" Husbands, children, jobs whatever are left behind as we potluck it up at someone's place and talk; and do we ever talk. The books are conduits to everything. Love: "Girl, let me tell you how I had to go off on (fill in the appropriate significant other's name here) for being a man." To work: "Sometimes I wonder if I'm doing the right things with my life, but if I am lord knows I need more money." To kids: "It's hard being a mother even when the father is around...followed by "I'm so scared to have a kid." If it's chance to talk, then we're there and we're doing it.
We're about 7 books in now, sparking in us the deep seeded sisterliness that ties us together after almost 10 years. I love my book club. It involves some of my favs--literature, food, alcohol (yes honey there must be at least 2 bottles of wine and some *ahem* hard liquor), and my girls. There is no pretentiousness. No one is acting appalled when someone says that they identified with the little white girl who felt sad and alone. No one is blaming the battered woman for not running for she knew nothing else. No one is talking above the girl's quest to get married because she thinks it's what she's supposed to do. Book club is an honest space where your opinions are heard, respected, maybe even dissected but never goes unappreciated.
Catch our status' on bookclub day, we're excited to get together, be free, and safe. We're posting how much we love our book club, and how we can't wait for the next one long before the current one has ended. We laugh until it hurts and sometimes cry a bit too--it's what we do when you're around love. And we end each time, sad that it's over, happy to have had that time away from everything that bumbles and busy our day, appreciating a vent session around a book, and loving each other a little more than when we came in.
Reading is FUNdamental.
Love & Light ya'll
No let's talk about this bookclub. Yes, we choose some juicy literally novel--sorry no hood novels allowed--and read it. Holding off on all conversations about the book other than the random "Did you finish the book yet?" Husbands, children, jobs whatever are left behind as we potluck it up at someone's place and talk; and do we ever talk. The books are conduits to everything. Love: "Girl, let me tell you how I had to go off on (fill in the appropriate significant other's name here) for being a man." To work: "Sometimes I wonder if I'm doing the right things with my life, but if I am lord knows I need more money." To kids: "It's hard being a mother even when the father is around...followed by "I'm so scared to have a kid." If it's chance to talk, then we're there and we're doing it.
We're about 7 books in now, sparking in us the deep seeded sisterliness that ties us together after almost 10 years. I love my book club. It involves some of my favs--literature, food, alcohol (yes honey there must be at least 2 bottles of wine and some *ahem* hard liquor), and my girls. There is no pretentiousness. No one is acting appalled when someone says that they identified with the little white girl who felt sad and alone. No one is blaming the battered woman for not running for she knew nothing else. No one is talking above the girl's quest to get married because she thinks it's what she's supposed to do. Book club is an honest space where your opinions are heard, respected, maybe even dissected but never goes unappreciated.
Catch our status' on bookclub day, we're excited to get together, be free, and safe. We're posting how much we love our book club, and how we can't wait for the next one long before the current one has ended. We laugh until it hurts and sometimes cry a bit too--it's what we do when you're around love. And we end each time, sad that it's over, happy to have had that time away from everything that bumbles and busy our day, appreciating a vent session around a book, and loving each other a little more than when we came in.
Reading is FUNdamental.
Love & Light ya'll
Wednesday, June 3, 2009
Vision Board
Back in November, I was co-chair for an Economic Empowerment Seminar. I took a backseat to getting the guests and I'm glad I did. I sat in on one of the AM sessions "Going After What You Want" and was moved by my soror who talked about being motivated to go after your dreams. Now I'll admit that I'm a 'fraidy cat when it comes to certain things. I worry about other people's thoughts--what will my 'rents say; will my friends think I'm crazy; will the random Jane on the street diss me? I can weigh the negative outcomes on anything but at the same time I will find a positive spin on the rainiest days.
At this session, I felt myself getting inspired as we went around the room and people were saying what they wanted to do. Someone wanted to start a lingerie line for fuller sized women, another wanted to start her catering business, and another wanted to see if she should leave her cushy Corporate America job to start a non-profit to benefit young girls. And then it was my turn and in front of a bunch of people--some I knew, most I didn't--I opened my mouth and said "I want to be a make-up artist." SHUT YOUR FACE was my immediate internal reaction, I almost clamped my hand over my mouth. But I meant every word of it. The presenter, worked as a freelance make-up artist, and told me to see her after the session. I was dancing in my chair--no one could see this of course. What great morning session and we were only 15 minutes in!
The presenter then spent the next 45-minutes of the session talking, and I found myself growing more inspired by her words. She didn't try to re-invent the wheel but her sassy, straight to the point attitude SPOKE to me. I was moved and mentally cataloging what my next steps were going to be in order to make my dreams--not just being a make-up artist--happen but things that I was not really to give up and do.
At the end of the session, I went over to the presenter and she said "So you know you're not ready to go out and paint faces right?" I just nodded. She said "You got some work to do and I don't mean here at this seminar. Sister, when you leave here, go out to Target or Staples, get you a corkboard, some pushpins, post-it notes, and markers. Create your vision board." Immediately, the vision of a video treatment came to my mind and I didn't see the connection. Reading my body language, she took my hands in hers and said "A vision board is where you allow yourself to say all those things you won't allow yourself to say out loud to anyone. Your vision board is where you tack up those dreams and aspirations that seem silly and childish. But they're not. Those are your dreams and you use that to inspire you. Put it someplace that you will see everyday and remind yourself of what your WANT to do."
Following her advice, I took myself and bought a vision board. I have it right across from my bed and I see it everyday before I go to sleep and when I wake up. Posted up are the little things, pay off the credit cards by June 2009; go to Bikram more and the not so little things, complete the MUD make-up course by August 2010 ($3400); buy a house (straight grown up status). It's my inspiration and I wouldn't have it any other way... It reminds me of where I'm headed, even on the days where I feel like I'm all mixed up.
So go out and get your vision board--decorate it with your hopes, your dreams, the secrets you're afraid to share--but should. The only thing holding you back is you--so MOVE and get out of your own way!
Love & Light
At this session, I felt myself getting inspired as we went around the room and people were saying what they wanted to do. Someone wanted to start a lingerie line for fuller sized women, another wanted to start her catering business, and another wanted to see if she should leave her cushy Corporate America job to start a non-profit to benefit young girls. And then it was my turn and in front of a bunch of people--some I knew, most I didn't--I opened my mouth and said "I want to be a make-up artist." SHUT YOUR FACE was my immediate internal reaction, I almost clamped my hand over my mouth. But I meant every word of it. The presenter, worked as a freelance make-up artist, and told me to see her after the session. I was dancing in my chair--no one could see this of course. What great morning session and we were only 15 minutes in!
The presenter then spent the next 45-minutes of the session talking, and I found myself growing more inspired by her words. She didn't try to re-invent the wheel but her sassy, straight to the point attitude SPOKE to me. I was moved and mentally cataloging what my next steps were going to be in order to make my dreams--not just being a make-up artist--happen but things that I was not really to give up and do.
At the end of the session, I went over to the presenter and she said "So you know you're not ready to go out and paint faces right?" I just nodded. She said "You got some work to do and I don't mean here at this seminar. Sister, when you leave here, go out to Target or Staples, get you a corkboard, some pushpins, post-it notes, and markers. Create your vision board." Immediately, the vision of a video treatment came to my mind and I didn't see the connection. Reading my body language, she took my hands in hers and said "A vision board is where you allow yourself to say all those things you won't allow yourself to say out loud to anyone. Your vision board is where you tack up those dreams and aspirations that seem silly and childish. But they're not. Those are your dreams and you use that to inspire you. Put it someplace that you will see everyday and remind yourself of what your WANT to do."
Following her advice, I took myself and bought a vision board. I have it right across from my bed and I see it everyday before I go to sleep and when I wake up. Posted up are the little things, pay off the credit cards by June 2009; go to Bikram more and the not so little things, complete the MUD make-up course by August 2010 ($3400); buy a house (straight grown up status). It's my inspiration and I wouldn't have it any other way... It reminds me of where I'm headed, even on the days where I feel like I'm all mixed up.
So go out and get your vision board--decorate it with your hopes, your dreams, the secrets you're afraid to share--but should. The only thing holding you back is you--so MOVE and get out of your own way!
Love & Light
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)